An ode to an ode to the grecian urn - part 1

He said ....

If I have to make a list of the most boring things to do in life - sitting in an airport for a flight a couple of hours away is easily one of them - even above swatting flies on a sunny afternoon, or wading through a boring book. I have heard of men who carry "lounge books" and finish it in one sitting in an airport seat. But, I have never wasted time on such wordy pursuits. Usually, I do what men in my league of wisdom prefer to do - sleep. However, not this time - for there before me was an arrestingly beautiful young damsel with a book in her hand which I am sure she isn't reading. And probably for the zillionth time, I am sitting here rehearsing my starting lines.

Is it just me - Every time I enter the airport, I have such a strong feeling that I am going to accidentally run into some interesting girl and we would talk about every little thing under the sun and voila! we become friends for life. The girls indeed do arrive, my mind does indeed flutter - but the first few words get stuck to the lips and refuse to move. But this time is going to be different .... let's try the usual lines first.

"Hi, any idea what's the time right now?

"Either you should be extremely short sighted and should have a bangle and not a watch on your wrist. Or you don't know to interpret time on a watch - either way, Not interested"

"Hi .. pretty lonely out here huh!"

"Yup, they stopped midnight carnivals in the airport a couple of centuries ago"

Or simply,

"Hi, I think I have met you before"

"Nope. I know what you are thinking. that was my step sister!"

Arghh! Adding to the misery was this 55 year old aunt who knew what was running in my mind and was waiting for me to get snubbed. Ahaa! not so soon grand mummy! this horse waits before it's the bait!

So, just to get things going, I picked up my existing key chain and tried shifting the keys to the new one I was presented with. Sometimes, that can get a little tricky - especially when the key chain is new (as it is usually is when it's gifted). So, you have one key that you use to split the ring wide while you try with your one free finger to push the other keys in. Things were going fine until that destined moment - I don't know what exactly happened. But due to some strange mysterious force, the key slipped out of the ring, travelled in the air and fell into the cup of tea that the person next to me was drinking. Thanks to archimedes principle, the hot tea spilled on his new blazer and a drop hit his glasses leaving a brown trail until it settled on his white shirt making him look more angrier than he actually was. Show me a well gentlemen, I don't deserve to live. I cringed, cut a very sorry face and apologised to him. He gave me an young-men-of-these-days look, gave me some sound advice and walked away. Just as I was looking for wells around to jump, through the corner of my eye I saw her smile. Did she .. really doesn't matter that she laughed AT me. She noticed. God! why am I so miserable that I fall in love with every girl who gives me the slightest of attention.

I tried to shut her out and go to sleep - but couldn't help wondering what was running in her mind or whether she was still looking at me. I opened my eyes and saw that the 50-something aunt had left. She's had her laugh anyways - I had made up my mind. Keep it frank - "hi, I am really getting bored in the airport and would love to have someone to talk to. I have a pretty good sense of humour and I am sure you would love my company. Is this seat taken?". I was sure even the worst case cant be worse than dropping a key into someone's cup of tea and losing it forever (just because you were too ashamed to ask him again).

I picked my bags, combed my hair with my fingers and stood up - I was confident, smart, funny. I am the king of the world. Just as I took the first step, the announcement came in loud and clear - "This is the first call for all passengers who are traveling by the flight AI 142". And I had an extremely compulsive desire to please the airport staff by leading the row of passengers. So close .. so damn close. Deep down, a voice asked me to wait for the next call. But probably, it was a omen. She probably is a suicide bomber - it felt wise to leave things as they were. my lady, I am sad to leave without telling you how much love you. But duty calls - till we meet the next time. Adios!